Don't Be A Jerk!

Understanding Fundamental Attribution Error.

So, I’m drivin’ down the road … mindin’ my own business.

In a zombie-state … enjoying the sweet aroma of my coffee and mentally assembling my to-do list for the day. The only thing motivating me forward is the song I have cranked to 11 on the radio. Maybe it’s Zeppelin … maybe Rob Base & DJ EZ Rock … the point is that I’m air-drumming with metronome precision and crooning like a virtuoso so the surrounding drivers can enjoy.

All I want is to get around the damn truck in front of me, not because it’s driving slowly but because I want to pass something. The next thing I know, I’m in the middle of an intersection, looking up at a red light, horns blaring all around me.

But, it’s not my fault!

I couldn’t see around the darn truck.

I wasn’t completely awake because I hadn’t finished my first coffee yet.

I couldn’t stop during the drum solo.

Oh well, no harm, no foul.

Three blocks later, I’m drivin’ down the road … mindin’ my own business … when some #$%@ runs a red light. Because I had to wait for this %*@#, it added five whole seconds onto my drive.

What’s wrong with this guy?!?

What a jerk!

What a terrible driver!

How selfish?!?

In psychology, it’s called Fundamental Attribution Error … a built-in bias that when we do something wrong, extenuating circumstances are always at play, but when someone else does something wrong, it’s their inherent character flaw.

While I had no good reason to run the light, the guy who cut me off may have been distracted, thinking about a terminally ill child. They may have been driving home after being fired. They could have any legit reason for a mild distraction. But I jumped straight to calling him names assuming his day-to-day driving skills suck.

Imagine a world where we all give each other the same leeway that we grant ourselves!!!

Understanding Fundamental Attribution Error can make you a better spouse, parent or employee.

When a preoccupied mom is difficult to work with … When a frustrated man is short with you … Maybe they’re not fundamentally flawed … Maybe they’re just as distracted as you would be in the same situation. Heck, maybe they’re handling their stress better than you would!

The point is that the world is not out to get you. People are not plotting to systematically ruin your day. Everyone around you is just as flawed as you are … and they deserve the benefit of the doubt.

Strive to be aware of Fundamental Attribution Error. Or, like your mom taught you, treat others as you would want to be treated.